francene--blog. Year 2013
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April 6th

4/6/2013

 
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www.intellasia.net
Peer group pressure can be explained if we observe animals' behavior.

A study has found that crested macaque monkeys follow friends before family. Gaze following is very important in macaque society, helping the animals to find food or spot potential danger. This reflects the importance of friendship in complex societies, where animals live together and rely on one another. In some species, friends are probably as important as family and dominance status.


Picture
www,telegraph.co.uk
Teenagers to want to copy their friends by wearing certain clothes or listening to a particular type of music. Some kids give in to peer pressure because they want to be liked, to fit in, or because they worry that other kids may make fun of them if they don't go along with the group. Others may go along because they are curious to try something new that others are doing. The idea that everyone's doing it may influence some kids to leave their better judgment behind.

While peer pressure might be the reason for trying their first cigarette or can of beer, it can also be invaluable in teaching them life skills and a sense of loyalty and leadership. For boys, friends act primarily as companions, people with whom they can play football, share a joke, hang out and listen to music. For girls, friends are people with whom they can share secrets, worries and anxieties. Without companions, it's more difficult to learn about social skills and relationships.


Picture
minglecity.com
I've seen the bad side of peer pressure.

Forty years ago I moved to a small town in South Australia. During the summer holidays, my tall, popular son became a Christian. When he started high school, we chose an area school, mainly for children from local farms, one hour away on the school bus. He came home with bruises and a shadow of his former jovial self. I spoke to the head teacher and the bus driver about the problem. It turned out he had loudly declared he would always turn the other cheek. The other students rose to the challenge. They punched him, even younger, smaller boys, for over a year. The Christian bus driver couldn't suggest any solution and neither could the head master. At last, Kym took action and went over the top defending himself; eventually becoming so strong nobody could get the better of him. This life-lesson resounds within me even now. He must have learned that might is right.

Although he remained loving towards me, peer-group pressure wiped out all the positive thinking and optimism he had developed. I wrongly thought an escape to the country might save the children from bad influences. Maybe the extra two hours away on the school bus tilted the balance.

My wonderful son died in an accident at the age of 28 years.


Dot Hurley link
4/5/2013 11:03:02 pm

As the mother of a teenage daughter I come across this frequently. She would much rather stay 'in with the crowd' even if it doesnt serve her in the long run. Still as you say theyhave to learn for themselves

Francene Stanley link
4/6/2013 03:43:25 am

Sometimes, they learn to their cost.

Amy link
4/5/2013 11:03:49 pm

Ohhh, Francene, I am so sorry. Your dear lovely son. I loathe bullying in any form, and I can't believe there weren't adults in the situation who could have helped your son. I'm sorry that you lost him. I can't imagine anything harder to go through. :(

Francene Stanley link
4/6/2013 03:44:21 am

The bullying is just another form of peer group pressure.

Linda - Heart of a Ready Writer link
4/6/2013 02:45:34 am

Your top photo looked familiar to me, as we took a family jaunt to the zoo this past week, celebrating the first warm and sunny day of spring.

So sorry to hear about your son, who clearly stood up for his faith. <3

Visiting from the Ultimate Blog Challenge FB group.

Francene Stanley link
4/6/2013 03:45:47 am

How lovely to visit the zoo. Thank you for your kind thoughts. A parent never likes to lose their child.

AMummysLife link
4/6/2013 08:46:29 am

Peer pressure is something that worries as my oldest is now at school. she already shows some of the attitude that children seem to display once they hit school age and I know that it will most likely get worse as she gets older.

Francene Stanley link
4/6/2013 07:06:23 pm

Every child changes when they hit school. You just have to hope that your early care has penetrated her brain and will see her through each temptation.

Alana link
4/6/2013 09:17:49 am

I found, in my personal experience raising my son, that peer pressure worked both for good and for ill. Francene, you have mentioned about losing your son before. I know someone whose son died from a heart defect that couldn't be treated "back then" and who died in his teens. I know from her that the pain never goes away completely. My heart goes out to you as a fellow parent.

Francene Stanley link
4/6/2013 07:12:34 pm

I'm glad your experience was ballanced. There's no avoiding the influence of others anyway, so we might as well take what good we can from the situation.


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    Author

    Francene Stanley, author of many published novels. If you like my writing, why not consider purchasing one of my books? You'll see them on the sidebar below.
    Born in Australia, I moved to Britain half way through my long life.

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